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Single Still or Again?

April 07, 2012 | Comments: 0 | Views: 184

There are many scenarios in which people today are living out their lives single. They are single because of death, divorce, separation, abandonment, and some by choice. Whatever the reason, living single can afford many benefits as well as pose some monumental challenges. If you are single, look at the tremendous amount of freedom you have in regards to the way you spend your time. You have no one to consult with or coordinate plans and schedules; but on the other hand, if you are a single parent, you have the sole responsibility of providing for the needs, care, and welfare of your children. If you add another relationship to these responsibilities, you have a very busy lifestyle.

Having joined several internet dating sites myself, I noticed that there are many people who have entered mid-life having never been married. I cannot speak to this scenario with any degree of experience because I have been married. My friends that are single by choice at the mid-life point have shared with me the benefits and challenges of being single. I think we should establish this fact: single does not necessarily mean lonely. In essence, the lifestyle of a single implies strong, independent, and focused.

Whether single by choice or not, there are some real challenges we face daily.

1. The challenge of too much to do and only one of me.

The days we live in are demanding. It takes a lot of effort, energy, and time working, eating right, and trying to stay in shape. Add to the mix household chores, car maintenance, book-keeping, and paying attention to your faith life and your plate is full. Now, that just describes the responsibilities of a single person. If you are a single parent, add to those responsibilities the care and provision of a child or children.

Stress and fatigue will be the norm if you do not decide the course of your life and then stay focused on that course.

2. The Challenge of Dating

Dating can be interesting, challenging, scary, and at times can seem like an incredible waste of time. If you date casually, where would you begin to look for a date? If you have ever visited an internet dating site, you know these can be very interesting. People can be anything they want to be hiding behind a well-written profile page; they can throw up some nice pictures of themselves and there they are, the person of your dreams.

If not the net, where do you meet prospective dates? There are a lot of single people out there, why can't I find at least one person to date? Honestly, after being single for over half of my life, I have arrived at this conclusion:

Psalm 37:4 (NAS)

Delight yourself in the LORD; and He will give you the desires of your heart

If you look at the story of creation, you will find Adam busily tending to and taking care of his responsibilities in God's brand new world. God recognized his need for companionship and created for him a woman, Eve. The lesson here is when we trust God for provision and busy ourselves with His plans for our lives, He will provide and meet our relationship needs as well. Don't allow loneliness or other pressures to drive you towards bad dating decisions. Go slow before making commitments. If you find yourself Single again, or as a choice, continue to learn, and grow to become or continue living "Successfully Single."

Michael McDermott is a motivational speaker, author, and musician. His series, Keepin' It Real, Volume's I, II, and III; Just Sayin' Volume's I, II, II; Successfully Single, Success isn't Accidental, Volumes 1,2; Keepin' it Real, How to Self-Publish Your Book, as well as Music and teaching audio CD's are available @ and some titles are available as E-Books @ Amazon and Barnes and Noble. Please read more @

Source: EzineArticles
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