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Advice on Female Orgasm Typically Relies on Ignoring the Fact That Many Women Fake Orgasm

April 20, 2012 | Comments: 0 | Views: 212

Many women experts are genuinely baffled by questions about orgasm. They assume every woman approaches sex with the same expectations and draws the same conclusions. Since few can masturbate, there is no common ground for discussion.

Women who describe sex as orgasmic explain their arousal not in terms of being attracted to men in general but through engaging in sex with one particular man. They orgasm in response to their partner's sex drive to initiate sex with them.

Their 'solutions' revolve around relationship issues rather than explicit stimuli of any kind, which makes little sense to a woman who masturbates. Few women appreciate that arousal is a response to erotic stimuli. It has nothing to do with a relationship.

Women who masturbate are only assumed to have a 'problem' because others claim to orgasm during sex. No one acknowledges the harm done by the sexual bravado of a few. There should be a responsibility to explain how such orgasms are achieved.

One therapist told me that she trawls the web for tips to pass onto her clients (e.g. pointing your toes might help with orgasm!). Other experts suggest (without any backing from research) that orgasm is achieved as easily with a partner as it is alone.

All of this advice (from the pseudo-informed to the sublime) indicates that experts pass on hearsay rather than give advice based on their own personal experiences.

Women's sexuality is defined by the implicit and conflicting 'evidence' of a few. Kinsey documented the amazing variety of mental and physical stimuli women suggest they use to orgasm: from none at all in either department to any combination imaginable.

You could ask a million women about orgasm and you would get a million different answers. Women don't even have the advantage of being as informed as men are.

Purely on the evidence of a tiny minority, women are believed capable of orgasm in response to stimulation of almost any part of their bodies. Since so few women are familiar with orgasm, no one ever dares challenge such ludicrous explanations.

Our sense of inadequacy comes from expectations set by stories of the supposed orgasmic abilities of unique individuals. Yet the very sensationalism of such stories highlights the rarity of women's true orgasmic response. Presumably there are also women with three tits but that does not justify making other women feel inadequate.

Likewise accounts of orgasm that depend on a relationship with one particular man cannot reasonably be compared with orgasms that arise from more explicit stimuli.

Some women stimulate the clitoris during sex but, since they do not masturbate, this technique does not prove that they know how to orgasm. Their partners pass on their knowledge from pornography that the clitoris is linked in some way with orgasm.

By Jane Thomas founder of www.WaysWomenOrgasm.org

Source: EzineArticles
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