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How Can the NLP Communication Model Benefit Me?

June 08, 2012 | Comments: 0 | Views: 101

The meaning of communication to another individual is the response it elicits in them, regardless of your intention. Everybody is 100% responsible for their communication; people respond to what they think you have said. If your communication is poor then they may not fully understand/grasp what you have said. There is no such thing as bad listeners just inflexible communicators, by taking responsibility for your communication and changing the way you communicate to different people then you will get more of what you want and less of what you don't want.

To understand how we take information into our neurology and how that affects our behaviour, we need to look at the "model of communication". It is based on the notion that our five senses; sight, hearing, touch, taste and smell, take in two million bits of information at any one moment. Our conscious mind however, is only able take in approximately 7 bits of information during this same time period.

In order to compensate for this vast difference the mind filters the events our senses take in by deleting, distorting and generalizing the information through our language, memories, attitudes, values, beliefs, decisions, etc. We then make an internal representation of the world we are taking in, with pictures, sounds and feeling. That puts us in a state of mind, which can change our physiology that affects our behaviour. All this happens in a fraction of a second and none of it has to happen in any particular order. We are in a constant state of flux, where our physiology can affect our attitudes just as easily as our behaviour can affect our language.

This model is the basis of all NLP. If we did not delete, distort and generalize the events we take in, consciously we would be in sensory overload. It's the sensation of more things happening than you can handle, which can be quite overwhelming, can't it?

DELETE - This is when we our omitting data or selectively paying attention to certain experience and not others. Think of a time when you were so engage in a conversion with someone that you were unaware of other events going on around you, i.e walking down the street. Have you walked down the street with a friend of the opposite sex and when back at home they ask if you saw the new phone /game /computer/electrical shop, which you didn't. You then talk about the girl with the bright green hair, or new clothes/handbag shop which they didn't notice.

DISTORT - Distortions are when we misrepresent our reality. A distortion is the alteration of the original shape of an object, image, sound, waveform or other form of information or representation. This is when you distort reality, i.e. can you imagine this room in red? Another example of distorting reality is when you and another person both go to see the same film or to the same meeting but you both have a different interpretation of what you saw/heard.

GENERALIZE -Generalizations are ideas or conclusions that have a general application/thing in common. It is putting ideas, people or things a convenient group or category, or drawing global conclusions. This is why you don't have to re learn how to drink from a different glass as you have generalized that it is the same as other glasses.

Watch the filters you place in your world, for the world is never what we think it is. If we are taking in 2 million bits of information and only aware of around 7 bits, there is much data we are missing.

The words we use are not actually the event or the item they represent. Although they describe the event we have chosen them to represent the words themselves are not the actual event itself. We create our own reality based on our past experience. Our language becomes a 'map' of the 'territory' of our constructed reality, through the information we have obtained through our five senses. We code, order and give meaning (through deletion, distortion and generalization) to our experience in words, sounds, pictures, feelings, tastes and smells. Five different people might all experience the same event but each will take a different experience away from it depending on their own beliefs and values.

Donna Blinston Certified NLP Trainer Arthor of - Psychobbable: A straight forward, plain English guild to the benefits of NLP & Arthor of the forthcoming book- Make New Year Resolutions - AND KEEP THEM USING NLP! Dolgellau, Mid Wales

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