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Communication - The Basis of a Relationship

February 27, 2012 | Comments: 0 | Views: 243

Relationships don't exist in a vacuum. They exist between two emotional human beings who bring their own past experiences, history, and expectations into it. Communication is the basis for any relationship. Any relationship blooms only if there is good communication between the two persons involved.

Good communication is a fundamental part of a healthy relationship. When people stop communicating well, they stop relating well, and times of change or stress can really bring out disconnect. As long as you are communicating, you can work through whatever problem you're facing. The more easily we connect to the other person more successful is our relationship. As simple as communication seems, many of us experience difficulties connecting successfully with others. Much of what we try to communicate-and others try to communicate to us-gets overlooked or misunderstood, which can cause conflict and frustration in both personal and professional relationships.

There are some steps for a good communication. First would be stop and listen. Sometimes with the fear of not being heard we keep on saying things without thinking what the other person has to say about it. It is very difficult at that moment to stop and listen to the other person.

The second step is force yourself to hear. If you have stopped saying that does not mean that you are listening to the other person. Your mind is still thinking what to do to prove your point. Just clear your head for a second and listen to what the other person has to say.

The third step is to be open and honest with your partner. Being open about what you feel and need is really important in a relationship. Giving the silent treatment is not a sign of a good relationship. Being open means talking about things you may have never talked about with another human being before in your life. It means being vulnerable and honest with your partner, completely and unabashedly. It means opening yourself up to possible hurt and disappointment. But it also means opening yourself up to the full potential of all a relationship can be.

The fourth step would be paying attention to non verbal signs. Most of our communication depends not on what we say but how we say it. Nonverbal communication is your body language, the tone of your voice, its inflection, eye contact, and how far away you are when you talk to someone else. Make and maintain eye contact, keep a neutral body stance and tone to your voice, and sit next to the person when you're talking to them.

The fifth step is stay focused in the here and now. It is very easy in an argument to forget about the topic on which you were arguing because in most of the cases people move on to other topics while fighting for small things. To solve this problem just turn away from the very respectfully and try to avoid the big argument. The sixth step is try to minimize emotion when talking about important big decisions. Nobody can talk about important, big matters if they feel emotionally vulnerable or charged-up and angry.

The big decisions like money, marriage, kids require serious thinking and should be taken when you are in a rational state of mind. The seventh step is be ready to cede an argument. Generally we all fight an argument because we want to be right. Nobody is ready to back off and accept his mistake simply because they want to be right. In such a case both sides need to back off. By this you can compromise n respect the other person and your relationship. The next step is humor and playfulness usually helps.

Humor and playfulness can easily be added to the conversation to lighten up the mood if there is frustration and helps put everything in perspective. Playfulness reminds us that even as adults we can take a break from seriousness of work. The last step is communicating is more than just talking. To communicate better and more effectively in your relationship, you don't only have to talk. You can communicate in other ways - through your actions, and nowadays, electronically too (through email, Facebook, blogs, texting or Twitter). Keeping in touch throughout the day or week through email or other electronic means also reminds the person you're thinking about them and how important they are in your life. Even if such communications are mainly playful or inconsequential, they can help lighten your partner's day and improve their mood.

Nobody is a perfect communicator all the time. But you can work to become a better communicator by trying a few of these tips. They won't all work, nor will they work all the time. Better communication, however, starts with one person making the effort to improve, which often encourages the other to come along for the ride.

aashna arora

Source: EzineArticles
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