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What Prevents You From Living an Amazing Life

February 18, 2012 | Comments: 0 | Views: 133

You may or may not know what is currently stopping you from living an amazing life. So to help you work that out here are some of the things people have told me that have stopped them, perhaps they may resonate with you.


This excuse is very popular with people who spend their life blaming their parents, their siblings or anyone they can think of. Now remember these grown adults who have made adult decisions about their own life, turn to me and tell me it was their up bringing that stops them living amazing lives. Can you believe that excuse? Yes I do understand the influence parents have on us and I'll be covering that in more detail later, but to use parents as an excuse is itself the very thing that does stop them.


This excuse is given as if it is someone else s responsibility that they didn't have an education. It is your responsibility to educate yourself.

So you can understand how I sit in my chair listening to this excuse and want to jump over the desk at some people, slap them and wake them up. If someone like me could re-educate myself anyone can.


This excuse is a very powerful one, because when a person creates this belief it can be difficult to dismantle. Be aware that both males and females often use this but for different reasons, at different times and for different outcomes. It appears that when people reach a certain age society dictates what they can and can't do.

Shame Fear Guilt

A major cause of people not living an amazing life is their inability to remove shame, fear and guilt. Once we remove them you will attract so much more into your life. Let me explain. Every single one of us on this planet can produce the feelings of guilt, fear or shame. All of us can and have at sometime in our lifetime. Now the problem is how do we get rid of these feelings and stop them resurfacing throughout our life?

We live in a world of opposites don't we? Where there is pleasure there is also pain. Love versus hate, happiness versus sadness. So we cannot ignore that there are always two sides to every feeling. We create them all and when it comes to shame, fear and guilt, they can be very debilitating. People who come to see me for help often are carrying so much of these primary negative emotions that their lives have been devastated. They say they feel heavy. No wonder.

Now life does come with both sides of the coin, so you would agree I know that life can and often does throw at us challenging moments. Moments like death, divorce and other tragedies. However I also know and so do you that no matter how bad you can feel you somehow keep on going, even though you didn't know how. It's our built in survival system, the part of our make up that just keeps us upright and with a pulse.

We soldier on no matter what, we keep a stiff upper lip and we just get on with it. So if we can and do that anyway, I figured out a long time ago that we may as well feel different and change those awful feelings as soon as we can, rather than carry them through life.

There are two powerful ways to change these feelings. One is with your 7% conscious mind, that's the voice inside your head which is of course you talking to yourself. People often do this at night just when their head hits the pillow for sleep. An odd time you would think to go and have a chat to yourself.

The other way to change those negative feelings is with your 93% un-conscious mind. When you use your 7% conscious mind you are using so little of your power it takes the trick of your mind to make it happen. Here's how you would go about it.

When you have something you feel ashamed about or fearful or guilty about I want you to write down 150 reasons (benefits). They have to be positive powerful benefits that have resulted out of that past experience. So if it was a relationship that ended and you felt guilty about what happened, you would write down what you and the other person gained from that. Today when you look back on it what is different in terms of what you have both learned?

I met a man who felt guilty for cheating on his partner. He said he couldn't live with the guilt anymore and he wanted to end his life. Together we listed as many positive statements about what he could look at differently now. At first he couldn't find anything positive about it, however with some encouragement from me he began to tell me that even though it was a year ago there was a difference in his relationship now. He said he was closer to his partner now than ever. Their own intimacy was more profound and emotionally closer.

The more he looked at the other side of what had happened, the more he began to heal. In two hours he cried, he laughed and by the time we had finished he had listed almost two hundred benefits of how such a terrible thing could have been a catalyst for his new feelings. He then told me he felt grateful for being able to have such a loving wife. Feeling grateful can move you to a calmer more soulful place.

No matter what happens in your life whether good or bad, you always need to look at both sides. When you do you can set yourself free from these terrible emotions. You can always find something good in anything. If you can't then you need to remember that life wasn't supposed to be just a walk in the park was it?

Write your list, yes of course I know this exercise will be different, notice I said different not difficult. No matter what your shame, fear or guilt is you can rid yourself of it right now, go to it and find some benefits in what happened. If it included another person or persons, include another 50 benefits for each person. How after the event does it benefit them? Remember the man who cried and how I was able to lead him into a different perspective.

I want you to think of your fear, shame or guilt and list any benefit you can think of now today, after the event. If you were hurtful to someone once, go back and now look at it differently. Now today it's different, because you said those things back then, the other person could now be wiser for your words to them.

What made you fearful back then won't bother you now when you look at it differently? False evidence is what fear is, so now you lived through that fear, it diminishes more and more. You will be very surprised at how many you can list and how reading them will make you feel very different.

It's time. Do your list now.

Patrick McNally PhD Author Therapist Business Strategist

Patrick has a PhD in Psychology, is a trained Clinical Hypnotherapist, an NLP Practitioner and is one of the worlds leading Change Clinicians and operates a private practice on three continents. UK, USA, Australia. He is a regular media commentator, appearing on Breakfast and Morning TV as well as taking calls from listeners on the many Radio talk back shows he appears on. He has featured in Pilot TV Shows on Fears and Phobias.

Patrick has been described as a cross between Dr Phil and Robbin Williams.

He is a Master Public Speaker and uses his sharp wit and infectious humour to it's full extent, offering audiences worldwide, laughter, fun, entertainment and knowledge.

He has become known worldwide for his amazing 60 second challenge, where he guarantees to change the way a client feels in under 60 seconds. Having performed this on TV and Radio.

His programs sell worldwide. For further details go to his products page.

Source: EzineArticles
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