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After The Affair: How To Deal With Infidelity

February 26, 2012 | Comments: 0 | Views: 207

When a married individual becomes sexually unfaithful to his or her other half, it is referred to as infidelity. Emotional affairs - being emotionally invested on a third party but not having sexual intercourse - are viewed as cheating. Unfaithfulness doesn't really happen out of the blue. It could be the consequence of unresolved concerns that begin to stack up. Even greater concerns may be the main cause of the warning sign which we call unfaithfulness. When infidelity occurs, some couples begin to understand that their relationship, in truth, requires some mending.

Infidelity happens. Infidelity affects a third of all couples, based on one commonly cited book. Men and women are susceptible to cheating but husbands are seen to cheat more than women. Figures demonstrate that about 35% of husbands and wives will stay together after the affair. Such figures are in fact encouraging and it shows us that it really is very possible to fix a married relationship in spite of an affair.

Many people believe that unfaithfulness is simply because of unmet sexual requirements. More frequently, the third party may fulfill the cheating spouse's emotional desires. Being understood, admired, and desired are just some examples of these emotional requirements. Such psychological requirements, if not fulfilled at home, might be satisfied by someone else.

After an affair, as indicated before, it is still possible for the husband and wife to fix the relationship. To help make the marriage work again, there are changes in their views that both spouses have to make. In case your spousal relationship is being affected by the injuries caused by unfaithfulness, you could be shocked to discover that your bond can become stronger. The loyal partner should be able to forgive a lot easier if the erring wife or husband is showing genuine regret. Time can heal all wounds like the old phrase goes and repairing a married relationship must not be forced. Some effort is needed from both parties to fix a broken relationship.

Guidance will help partners to understand why the unfaithfulness happened and to fix the actual underlying issue. The demands of both partners need to be identified and a plan must be worked out so the couples can give and take simultaneously. Forgiving is definitely much easier than forgetting as many victims of infidelity will attest to.

The affair occurred and it is crucial to acknowledge that. Disregarding it is just not possible. By allowing the reality to sink in little by little, you'll manage to eventually forgive. What you happen to be feeling is the right feeling and you really don't have to let anyone tell you that you should feel this way or maybe that way. Victims of cheating will go through various feelings and this is typical. Rather than struggling with the emotion, it is much better to just acknowledge it and then try to move on. You may realize that you'll be ready to forgive. Once you learn to forgive, you'll let the emotional load go and you'll become happier. You will really feel a lot better when you learn to let go.

You can test breathing exercises if you have to deal with feelings that impair your good common sense. Each time you are confronted with a choice and you sense that sentiments are hindering you, start breathing deeply. It won't take long. Just a few deep breaths and you should surely feel better and you will also have the ability to make superior choices.

There are more suggestions here about exactly what to do after an affair. Your spousal relationship could be much better than an affair.

Source: EzineArticles
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